If you have children with your ex-spouse, you will still be working together with him or her in tandem to raise your children after divorce. People commonly deem this as “co-parenting,” and usually this is the custodial arrangement after divorce unless there were serious problems in the family home.
However, if you have a contentious relationship with your ex-spouse, parenting together with him or her may seem like a nightmare. In situations where parents cannot manage a traditional co-parenting situation, parallel parenting may be a viable option. According to Healthline, parallel parenting is a form of co-parenting that involves very little contact between the parents.
How is this different from traditional co-parenting?
In a “normal” co-parenting situation, the parents will band together to support their children publicly. For instance, in a healthy co-parenting situation both parents may attend a baseball game to support their child, even though they divorced and may now have new partners.
With co-parenting, you would have one parent attending the game itself and the second parent may attend the post-game party. The parents would not be in the same place at the same time.
What are the advantages?
If you truly cannot be in the same place with your ex-spouse without an argument, parallel parenting will be far more beneficial for your family. Particularly if you have a narcissistic ex-spouse, this may be the only healthy arrangement in the long run. However, it is also possible that after a period of successful parallel parenting, you may be able to transition into the more traditional co-parenting arrangement.